My Nephew, Dallas, my older Sister's son, got in a food fight at school recently and now has to serve a 3 day in school suspension. That of course doesn't mean the punishment is over. He still has to deal with his Mom. I thought getting in a food fight was funny, but of course deserves a punishment for bad behavior.

His little sister was worried about Dallas getting a spanking and defended him by saying "he didn't know any better". Yeah, it gets funnier. My Sis (Dallas's Mom) decided on a more creative punishment and it was not a spanking. Dallas, for a full 2 weeks, has to wear the outfits his Mom chooses! LOL, that punishment is AWESOME and fits (pun intended) the crime. In addition to that, he's on poop duty for his dog AND the neighbor's dog.

Dallas is currently wishing he'd got a spanking.

In my eyes, this is what Family is all about. Sharing, caring and learning from each other. I would never have thought of dressing my daughter the way I want as a form of punishment, but I bet one day it will come in very handy. It will probably be the worst punishment she's ever heard of. Even worse than taking her phone/computer privileges away.

As most of you know who read this blog (all both of you), I am in training to become a Sommelier (of wine). It's for fun, a hobby of sorts, and possible career later in life. I know not all of you like wine so, luckily for you, there is another path to becoming a Sommelier!

Yes and ONLY in Japan, you can become a Sommelier of... you guessed it... mobile phones. You can help all the lay people choose the best phone for their needs and make PHAT commissions on all of your recommendations. You can build a client base that trusts you and will only deal with you when purchasing the latest and greatest in mobile phones. Which vintage do you want? An '07 or '08? What varietal do you want? Smartphone, Mulitmedia, Plain Jane? Top of the line only? An iPhone? Only you can help them navigate the windy and confusing path of phones features and calling plans.

Get started on your new career!

Ok this is hella funny! Opera is suing Microsoft in Europe and wants Microsoft to remove Internet Explorer from Windows...

http://nldd.lordabdul.net//12.html

I use Gmail and of course it is free, but is Ad supported. Well my name is Hank and my friend calls me Hanky Panky. Check out the ad that was shown in an email I was sent. I just HAD to laugh.

Awesome!

I guess I have to vote for Huckabee.

http://www.newsweek.com/id/73272

I don't want Chuck to round house me in the throat.

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com

Day 3 - another rookie (aptly named Rookie 1) comes to check out the Coffee Maker. Rookie 1 hesitantly pushes a button and the grinder starts grinding grrrrrrrrr reeeee rreeeee grrrrrrrr. After yesterday, rookie 1 asks advice from the Group (note, not all of the Group is in the office yet) on how to  make the water of life, er, I mean coffee. Rookie 2 speaks up and says, "they've shown me how, but I've never done it. This looks right", and the button is pushed and the grinding begins. Smiles all around...

...although for some reason, the grinder is more quiet today and the Group takes notice. That's not loud enough. Something must be wrong. Hurry stop it and check it or we'll have to dump the coffee again! We're too late. We can't stop it. Oh no! The coffee is coming out clear.

Rookie from yesterday (the one with the Hot Milk will be named Rookie HM) has made it to the office. He's not surprised it didn't work and goes over to take a look at The Coffee maker. He walks right up to it, hands on hips, leans back and tilts left and right to get a better angle on the Coffee Maker. He's leaning forward now, he sees something. Nope, false alarm.

Meanwhile Rookie 2 has taken the coffee filter to be cleaned and has returned to the Coffee Maker with a clean filter. More wasted coffee. The Group is saddened. Rookie 2 has handed over the reigns of coffee making to Rookie HM. Attempt number TWO. More fiddling, jiggling and wiggling w/the filter before pushing the button.

"Have to make sure its in correctly. It was clogged up yesterday", says Rookie HM. Rookie HM asks Rookie 2, "So just push the brew button and it will go right?". Rookie 2, "I guess so".

grrrrrrrrr reeeee rreeeee grrrrrrrr but the grinding is still pretty quiet compared to days 1 and 2. Rookie HM starts smacking the Coffee Maker on the side. I guess the grinding wasn't loud enough.

Veteran (he's successfully made a pot of coffe with the Coffee Maker) coffee maker shows up. Day 3 has produced two failed attempts at making a pot of coffee. Rookies 1, 2 and HM are attentively watching the Veteran. Apparently the Coffee Maker is "backed up" again. Veteran clears the blockage and gets the coffee a-brewing and explains where the blockage happens and how to prevent the blockage. Meanwhile, I'm on my 3rd cup of coffee...

Update, 3rd times a charm. The grinding is LOUD, the beans are going down, and Coffee is being made. Coffee making is now considered a TEAM building exercise. 

Day 2 - Some rookie (note, they are all rookies) to The Coffee Maker has tried to make the coffee. The beans did not grind and he was rewarded with pouring hot water into his cup that already has some milk and sugar in it. He blames the Group for not reading the manual and tries to pawn off his cup of hot milk. This rookie fiasco has drawn the attention of the Group and they are all now "repairing" the damage to The Coffee Maker. Apparenlty something got clogged up and they have placed a trash can next to and under The Coffee Maker. The Coffee Maker is on its side... coffee grounds, coffee beans and hot water are cascading down into the trash can. The Group is lamenting the loss of all that good coffee.

The Coffee Maker is clean... Let's hope this works (says the Group)... Beans check, Grinder setting check, Water check... go, go, go! grrrrrrrrr reeeee rreeeee grrrrrrrr It's working, it's working! The rest of us drop our heads down in defeat... our hopes dashed... we will continue to have to endure the noise of the grinder, the chatter of the Group, and their smug faces with their perfect cup of coffee.

Here's the set up: I work for an energy company and the floor I'm on has an open LARGE workspace. Just rows of desks, offices by the windows and conference rooms in the middle. We have a well equipped break room with 2 coffee makers and they can keep 6 pots of coffee hot simultaneously. The coffee is actually pretty good too and we have all the fixins: white packets, yellow packets, pink packets, blue packets and non-dairy creamers.  So here begins Day 1 of The Coffee Maker.

Day 1 - One of the sales guys brings in a fancy new coffee maker for the Sales Group. You know, one of those where you put the whole beans in, then it grinds just the right amount, right before the coffee bets brewed... 

A group of people start to surround the coffee machine as it starts grinding the coffee with the obligatory oohs and aahs and that's so cool. Meanwhile the rest of the entire office floor has their fingers in their ears because the grinding sound is at a deafening volume grrrrrrrrr reeeee rreeeee grrrrrrrr for about 3 minutes... when it's finally done causing a racket, we get the obligatory mmm that smells good and we don't need no Starbucks as the coffee finally starts brewing.

The brewing process is almost done. Now it smells like burnt coffee grounds and there are small whisps of smoke or steam emanating from The Coffee Maker. It stinks! and most of us are wondering if it has caught fire. Alas, that's just how The Coffee Maker works and the coffee is done. The Group starts passing the carafe around like it is the Water of Life and pouring themselves their very own cup of joe. The Group is huddling around sipping the hot coffee eyeing each other with looks of satisfaction and that really hits the spot looks. They are silently congratulating themselves on scoring such a wonderful cup of coffee.